The Cancer Playlist.

Home is so good for my heart. There are familiar faces—so many faces that I dearly miss in Albany. There are long coffees with best friends and hours spent laughing over nothing. There are runs with my brother, back-to-school shopping with my sister, breakfasts with my Dad, … [Read more...]

On Choosing Truth.

I am driving three hours to the airport this morning. Three hours with the windows rolled down and the soothing sounds of James Taylor calling me home to North Carolina. It’s hardly a road trip, but something in this endless stretch of highway makes me remember. I remember Ian … [Read more...]

Waiting for my Wooden Leg.

In the wake of Ian’s death, I was flooded by a precious barrage of cards and books about grief that friends with their own grief stories thought might be helpful. I have faithfully read every one, and undoubtedly the book that I return to the most is my now dog-eared copy of CS … [Read more...]

That Sucks, and I’m Sorry It Happened to You.

This past weekend, it finally happened. I’d been dreading it since the moment I walked out of Ian’s ICU room for the very last time. I remember walking into the pristine, whitewashed hallway with sunshine pouring through oversized windows, and thinking that it should have been … [Read more...]

The Picture.

I used to love wedding shows like Say Yes to the Dress, but I’ll confess that since my own wedding, I cringe and scramble for the remote control at the slightest flash of crinoline. Something in me can’t watch women thoughtfully ponder the merits of lace and birdcage veils, … [Read more...]

Anchored.

I packed up a Budget truck the morning after Ian's funeral and puttered onto the highway knowing exactly one person in the great city of Albany. I wake up next to him every morning. There is not a familiar winding road or an old friend’s knowing smile or a “usual” cup of coffee … [Read more...]